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You get overwhelmed, frustrated and stressed and do you ask for help? Of course you don't.

What is up with that? Is it embarrassment? Shame? Or do we just love pulling our hair out?


I totally get it. Unfortunately, I do not have a long history of asking for assistance. In fact, as the oldest child in the family, asking for help is actually a very new experience for me. I want to have the answers. I don't want to rely on someone else, and if I'm honest, I just have always done things my own way.

I don't know if it's that I didn't want the criticism or was impatient, but I have never been the kind of person to ask for a helping hand when I'm struggling..... that is, until recently.


This is a part of our "Self Love Standard." Recognizing our strengths and respecting our weaknesses. I am not good at everything. I am good at a lot of things but for instance, I am not a planner or organizer. I am energized, charismatic, spontaneous, and goal oriented. I see something and I run full steam; I'm not all that concerned with checking my metaphorical mirrors or buckling up for that matter. I just GO! When I realized I was being called to help others find their activation point and establish their self love standard, for the first time in FOR-EVER (I am such a mom, I just sang that like the Frozen song), I was fully aware that I could not tackle this alone. I needed someone who was not 'in your face' and spastic. (Those are some of my finer qualities. LOL!) While I was pouring into others, developing a new method of coaching, and writing content, I needed someone in the front seat driving. Asking for help was one of the most humbling things I've ever done. I chose to partner with someone who I knew understood my personality, vision, and, most importantly, they excelled at the things I don't. She's actually brilliant at the things I suck at, and I'm totally cool with it. She is methodical, organized, detail oriented, and the calm to my hurricane of excitement.


Here's what I want you to take away from this: part of your self love journey is coming to terms with 2 critical things;


1. You have given talents and strengths. You were not meant to do everything all at once and all alone. If you channel your energy toward your strengths, they grow stronger and sharper. Spread too thin, even your talents can get sloppy. Let someone else do what they are good at so you can do what you're good at better.


2. You empower your environment by recognizing talents in others. It's your inner self, aligning with someone else, pure MAGIC. Working with my friend and now manager (Hi, Michelle!) has been such a valuable lesson. You have to learn to ask for help. Empower other's to show you their talents.


I don't think I will ever forget one conversation Michelle and I were having where I realized how important it is to not only ask for help, but embrace it. It was late at night call, we had just finished out an online course and were recapping how it went. I was applauding her work towards getting content edited and submitted. She excels in this area. She is seriously so good, not to mention she edits all the blog posts including this one. Something she said has shaped a chapter of my own self love standard and how I incorporate others into my activation. She said, "Thank you for seeing my strengths and allowing me to use them on this project." It was profound and honest. People see my energy, wit, spontaneity, and hot mess tendencies, but there are such brilliant things happening behind the scenes that make all of this come together into something new and exciting. Don't be ashamed to ask for help. Any help. Business or personal. Someone out there is developing their own self love standard and is waiting to use their talents too.



©2020 by Lauren Matera.

Disclaimer: Your Activation depends on the energy you are willing to commit to it. Lauren is not a licensed clinician, counselor or therapist. There are no diagnoses or treatments during coaching. Results are not guaranteed and depend on a number of factors. Images and Numbers collected from this site are meant to showcase possibilities and are not a representation of results to expect.